The Helen Dictionary

I am beginning to realize how much Tara and I are like mom.  It seems like with each year we age, we pick up more and more Helen-isms.  The worst part is that we hear them so often, we don't even realize we're saying them, or that the people we are talking to have no idea what we're talking about.  So, with the help of my family and close friends, I will now define these Helen-isms.

Diddy Wadded - To get ready or dressed up.
Ex. Jeff - Where is Kellie?
      Helen - She's in there getting diddy wadded for dinner.

Horsed - To leave with some sort of attitude. Happy, sad, angry, whatever.
Ex.  Jeff - Where is Kellie?
       Helen - She just horsed on out of here with her keys.

Puttywaw - Female anatomy.
I don't think an explanation is necessary.

Slinging 'em around like sausages - When you are driving too fast, or taking turns too fast.
Ex.  Slow down, Kellie, you're slinging 'em around like sausages back here!

Plunk a Piani - Playing a Piano.
Ex.  She was plunkin' around on that piani.

Policeeman - Police officer.
Ex.  Did you see that ol' policeeman hiding back there?

Blast of sewer gas - To be loud or rambunctious in a room, sort of "like a bull in a china shop."
Ex.  She just came in here like a blast of sewer gas and took over!

Doomaflauchy - An object of some kind.
Ex.  Go get me that doomaflauchy.

DoodleyDoo - A hair utensil of some sort. Brush, comb, elastic band, etc.
Ex.  Get me one of those doodleydoos so I can braid your hair.

Ponked - To hit someone or hit something on something else.
Ex.  She just ponked him on the head.

Butthole Pucker - Doing something nerve wracking.
Ex.  SLOW DOWN, you're making my butthole pucker!