Life with Helen

I LOVE my dog, Ozzie, an unreasonable amount.  More than most humans.  I mean it.  I would take a bullet for Oz over almost everyone I know, except maybe like 15 people.  Sorry if you're not one of them.  Because I am so obsessed with him, I completely overindulge him.  He is so spoiled that I need a new word for it.  He gets special treats and food.  He sleeps in bed, under the covers, with his head on his own pillow.  He goes for at least 3 walks a day.  I come home from work at lunch time everyday to check on him.  The list goes on and on.  Recently, I have had several meetings scheduled on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so I have convinced Helen and Jeff to go pick him up on those days and I pick him up from their house after Zumba.  It is ridiculous, I know. Since he spends at least 2 days a week with his grandparents, he has grown pretty fond of them, as well as cousin Yogie.  As soon as we pull int...

After working and eating lunch in Cross Lanes for over 5 years, I've grown pretty tired of most of the restaurants.  Also, I am a "you screw up my food, I kill your family" kind of girl, so many restaurants just aren't up the the Kellie standards anymore.  I always LOVE La Roca, and I can tolerate a few others, but I really, really love the buffalo chicken salad at Buffalo Wild Wings.  So, when Helen gets a wild hair and decides to come meet me for lunch, sometimes we like to go there.  Now, we have been there several times before this incident, so she should definitely know better. We walk in BW3s and are greeted by the host, wearing his Buffalo Wild Wings football jersey uniform, as they always do.  Helen, a devout Buffalo High School fan, shouts out, "Look, Kellie, Buffalo!"  I turned around and gave her the "Really, Helen?" look.  She put her hands on her hips and said, "Ugh, Kellie, I know it's the professional team.  I'm not stu...

This was Ozzie's reaction to me coming home from vacation!  He is the cutest (and so is Helen haha)! He would run like that forever if we would let him! :)

I had a fabulous vacation, and I am REALLY NOT LOVING this whole work thing.  I've already been on my Employee Personal Page mapping out my retirement plan.  I'm thinking Beaufort would be lovely! I'm not going to really "blog" as much as describe some pictures. I went to Emerald Isle with Matt's family again, but this time with more family!  I ate, and I ate, and I ate some more.  I really thought I was going explode at some point.  It was so fab.  The picture of Matt and me on the left is at the Sanitary Fish Market, and the picture of the girls on the right is at Port of Call (which is probably my favorite place to eat in the entire world. SO good.)  And check out that sunset! Gorgeous! Matt took me golfing, which was fun for awhile, but then it started to get hot.  I decided that we needed a picture before the hair went up and I turned into a nasty, sweaty mess.  I promise, I really tried, but there were some holes that were ...

After my Helen Dictionary post, I received a few more Helenisms from some different people.  Needless to say, I feel that a part 2 is completely necessary! Crank up onto - Crochet, pronounced "Crotch-it" Ex.  Don't start the movie yet! I have to get my blanket to crank up onto. Wicker Wacker - Male anatomy. Once again, I don't think an explanation is necessary. War Paint - Make-up. Ex.  I'm not ready!  I haven't even put my war paint on! Boobs - Bra. Ex.  I took my boobs off and hung them on the doorknob. Easy Britches - Sweat pants. Ex. Go put your easy britches on and come watch this with me! These are some common phrases that Helen often uses or says incorrectly. Growing up, I cannot tell you how many times Helen told Tara and I that we were "sucking the life right out of her." The correct expression is "Hawk eyes and rabbit ears," but Helen always says "Hawk ears and rabbit eyes." You never have an at...