Life with Helen

First of all, I am fully aware that this story makes me sound like a complete nutcase, but I have shared plenty of my childhood antics with you all, so why stop now? Jimmy Fallon tweeted out asking for the #worstlieievertold.  I tweeted a couple, and then I remembered one in particular that I'm not even sure if I ever came clean to my family about. Oopsie. It all started with Santa's Workshop.  For those of you who aren't familiar (or maybe your school called it something else) I will elaborate.  When you are in elementary school, you can't exactly drive to the local Wal-Mart and Christmas shop, but being the sweet, innocent child that you are, you want to buy things for your family.  So, the parents at our school would go to the Dollar Tree, purchase little gifts, and set up a shop in the library where you could come at a certain time of day to purchase gifts for your family. The night before the start of Santa's Workshop Helen had a little chat with me.  She ma

That's right, I was certain the time had come, and I was meeting my maker this weekend.  The icy breath of death was upon my neck.  The white light was in the far off distance.  BUT as it turns out, it was just a virus!  I think it was karma for telling all of Facebook to stay away from my niece until this nasty stuff passes, but now I REALLY MEAN IT. I felt fine all day Saturday until I noticed a sharp pain in my stomach.  I mentioned it to Matt, then WebMD'd it and found out that it was either indigestion or cancer.  No biggie.  The pain {sort of} subsided, at least enough that I thought I would be fine to go out with my friends for NYE.  We got ready and went to Charles' apartment in Charleston for the festivities.  After about 1/2 a drink, I started to feel VERY queasy.  I tried to just ignore it as we headed downtown, but it was hard to ignore after we were packed like sardines in a tiny bar.  It was hot, and there was an extremely inebriated college aged girl head-ba